| | | Next week, you'll be spending what may seem like an unnatural amount of time with your family, for a little American holiday called Thanksgiving. It's a yearly ritual we're sure you look forward | | If you have trouble reading this email, go to the online version |  | |  | | | | | |  | | | | November 14, 2018 | | The Most Dysfunctional (Fictional) Families of the Year
See, Your Family Isn't So Bad... | |  | | | | | | | Next week, you'll be spending what may seem like an unnatural amount of time with your family, for a little American holiday called Thanksgiving. It's a yearly ritual we're sure you look forward to with an adolescent cocktail of "Shit, do I have to?" and "Wait, I actually want to?" It's great. (Or, sometimes, "great.") Will this be the year your dad finally understands what it is, exactly, you do? How many times will you have to explain what a "meme" is to your grandma? And who's going to end up poking the prickly Trump bear known as great-aunt Sally?
These questions, or questions like them, are certainly weighing on everyone's mind, because every family is dysfunctional, each in its own special way. But at least your family hasn't suffered irreversible physical and psychological damage due to an evil house, populated with over-acting flapper girl ghosts. At least your mom isn't surreptitiously poisoning you to death so you can be her pliable little doll. At least your dad doesn't premeditate setups to deliver ruthless homophobic slurs as a means of describing your latest business-related failure.
See? Compared to the most dysfunctional (fictional) families of the year, your family is probably pretty normal. Let's go through them now, one by one...
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