Story of a Girl

9.25.2013

UD | Breaking News in Not Getting Hangovers

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National
 
 
September 25, 2013
Skeptical Investigation
Some Black Goop That Maybe Cures Hangovers
UD - PürBlack
VITALS
PürBlack
official website
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We’re lovers. You know that. But every now and again, something comes across our desks that just seems... suspicious. Because of the tremendous material upside to all our lives if these claims pan out, we at times put ourselves in harm’s way to investigate. Albeit skeptically.

We call it: Skeptical Investigation. (Trademark pending.)


THE CLAIM
That PürBlack, a mysterious substance made from a new breed of superfood found only in the mountains of Siberia (yes, really), cures hangovers. And improves focus. And helps heal broken bones.

So naturally, we sent our most expendable charge out there to break a tibia and put this theory to the test.

Just kidding, they simply drank alcohol...

THE INVESTIGATION

... but not before first dropping the recommended pea-sized dollop into a glass of water and drinking it. It’s black. Looks like shoe polish. Tastes like tar and salt water. Moving on.

Our loyal test subject then enjoyed some gin and a few beers while the supposed minerals and antioxidants took hold.

Fade to the next morning.

THE VERDICT
We can neither confirm nor deny that this stuff is the reason, but we received reports of “Waking up and feeling fine. Kind of good, even.”

Thanks, Siberia.
 
Note:
PürBlack, available online now
 
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