You never know when you’ll find yourself stranded in the jungle with only your wits to save you. Okay... hopefully never. But just in case, consider
Jungle Survival: one or two weeks of
Heart of Darkness–ing your way through the Guyanese Amazon, where you’ll learn to build fires, bow-hunt boars and generally embrace the solo jungle lifestyle. (Or learn why you shouldn’t.)
Great, you’re interested. Here’s how you’ll do it:
The Insertion Phase
You’ll fly into Georgetown, Guyana’s capital. Then you’ll take another flight deep into the Amazon. Followed by a 4x4 ride. Followed by a boat ride. Followed by a long nap in your jungle hammock.
The Training Phase
You’ll
meet your guides—a mix of Brits and indigenous Amerindians—and commence your studies in Piranha Fishing 101 and Advanced Shelter Engineering. If you want, they’ll even take you on a jaguar-tracking expedition. Just pay close attention during your hunting lessons, because the next part is...
The Isolation Phase
You’ll find yourself alone in a deeper, unfamiliar part of the jungle with your machete, bow and arrow, some twine and... that’s about it. But thanks to your training (and all those
Lost reruns), you’ll be fine. After you’ve sufficiently bonded with nature, a search party will return you to civilization and cap things off with a trip to the world’s highest single-drop waterfall.
Because hey, you could use a shower.
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